Meet Kali

I go to my journey space. My plea is simple. I can’t stop fighting in my head. Please help me. I don’t want to fight anymore. I sit down cross legged on the ground placing my head in my hands crying a little for sheer frustration. A giant silver backed gorilla comes scooping me up in his arms. I am so despondent I don’t even move or look up but remain in a fetal position cradled in his enormous arm. He carries me up into the trees. I remain limp in his arms telling him I am sorry. There is something wrong with my head I whisper to him. I must be sick and need help. He remains silent as we swing from branch to branch just like the Tarzan movies. At some point we stop and he places me on the ground. He slips away quietly back into the void. I can sense I am not alone but nothing is visble yet. As I stand up Kali faces me. She is grotesque and fierce. Her skin is red with dark black matted hair. Her arms are waving in the air as she hops up and down kicking out her legs. Skulls and body parts jangle and her tongue is ridiculous hanging out at me. I am not afraid yet also unsure. She moves and jerks and gyrates attempting to intimidate me. I just stare with a hint of morbid fascination. I think is this me? What am I supposed to do with this ?!?! I don’t’ want to contain it and yet it needs to shift. It is becoming too much.. She is magnificent and terrifying. I think I am in love with her. Her energy is so in my face though, it won’t let up and I need a break. I ask, “What do I need to do with this energy? “ A voice responds, “Kiss her.” So I grab her face and kiss her square on the mouth. She is so shocked by this she freezes. Grabbing her hand we begin to run. We run through fields and fields of wild flowers. And as we run stuff begins to fall of Kali. Her head neacklace, her waist band of legs, a bone here and eyeball there drops into the flowers. She keeps trying to pick them up convinced she still needs them. I grab her hand tighter and yell we can’t stop and you won’t need them where we are going. We pick up the pace even faster so all she can do is focus on forward movement. The drum beats begin to slow. We stop running. As we catch our breath Kali has turned from red to blue wearing a shit eating grin with her usual wild eyes. A white tiger comes for her. She is ready to return, transformed back into battle. Her weapon of choice this time….. love. I watch her go as I slowly slip back into 3D reality.